Strawberry Friday: Graceful Exits

I had a special relationship with Sushila Blackman, compiler and editor of Graceful Exits: How Great Beings Die.  We met when I was three, living with my mom in a Siddha Yoga ashram in south Fallsburg, New York.  I once told her I was her mother in a past life.  We also shared a birthday, June 21, though probably 30 years apart.  On our birthday in the darshan line, Sushila gave Baba Muktananda a pink and orange scarf with gold thread.  Since it was also my 3rd birthday, when I got up in the darshan line, Baba re-gifted the scarf to me.  I still have it today.

When I was 24 and living in Taiwan I got a call from my mom that Sushila was dying of cancer.  I was scared to call, it had been so long since I had talked to her.  But I did remember our special bonds- our birthday and our cosmic birth order.  I called her as her mother from a former life, eased her mind about the circle of life, and told her I'd miss her and to come visit me. 

It was hard to be brave and made that call.  It's so easy to shy away from death, and to let hard calls like these pass us by.  But one thing I learned from mom was the worth and value of a loving, truthful goodbye.  I owed Sushila that much, and any other person I've come to know.

Sushila's book is amazing- it recounts the death stories of 108 Tibetan, Hindu, and Zen masters.  In the spirit of mom's cherished Strawberry parable, I share some of the entries for Strawberry Friday.

No. 3


    Senior disciples assembled at his bedside as Zen Master Taji approached death.  One of them, remembering the master was fond of a certain kind of cake, had spent half a day searching the pastry shops of Tokyo for this confection, which he now presented to him.  With a wan smile the dying master accepted a piece of the cake and slowly began munching it.  As he grew weaker, his disciples inquired whether he had any final words for them.
    "Yes," the master replied.
    The disciples leaned forward eagerly so as not to miss a word.
    "Please tell us!"
    "My, but this cake is delicious!"
And with that he slipped away.

Text credit: Graceful Exits: How Great Beings Die compiled and edited by Sushila Blackman, Weatherhill, Inc., p. 28
Photo credit: Sarah Miller and cover of Graceful Exits by Sushila Blackman and D.S. Noble.