Seven Wonderful, Terrible Years

From the desk of Lois Trever-Basten:

In late 1991 my husband died after a long illness.  He was strangely surprised that I "took such good care of him," but I thought after fifty years of keeping our wedding vows to "love and to cherish" each other "until death us do part," that no other course was to be considered.

He had said his goodbyes to Janet's children, grandson Andy and granddaughter Sarah, together the light of his life.

At the moment of his death Janet had finished packing all her worldly goods in a van, ready to start driving from Fort Collins, Colorado, to our home of almost 50 years in Arlington Heights, Illinois.  As always she was very helpful in arranging a warm memorial service and a blustery, rainy burial service.

Janet and I had some important health decisions to make.  She needed to find new good doctors to take over treatment of a mysterious lump in her jaw, and I too picked an eye surgeon to replace my defective eye corneas so that I could drive well again.  My short trips to the hospital had been fraught with danger of going over curbs and rocks, several of which I had actually already done.  I had my first eye surgery very soon.  Janet found a wonderful doctor for herself, Dr. George Sisson, to be her physician, surgeon, friend and partner.

In the week following Art's death there was a stunning electrical storm which darkened our lights and disabled most of our electrical household appliances.  We spent a lot of time taking the microwave over, televisions, toaster, everything but the computer (which fortunately had not arrived yet) to various repair shops.  All of theme were very difficult to find.  We felt that we were traveling, like Joe Btfsplk, of cartoon fame, under unending showers, trying to keep dry under a tiny umbrella, while all around us were enjoying sunny weather.

The time came for Janet's first surgery on that lump called the parotid gland.  A good sized group was with me including a young lady minister and friend, a soon-to-be minister Tom Barth, the long time friend of Janet's from 3rd grade, Sue Culliton, who about that time promised Janet to take her to all future medical appointments.  Sue was destined to wear out her good car taking Janet to Northwestern Hospital, Rush, Presbyterian, St. Luke's Hospital, University of Illinois Hospital, University of Chicago Hospital, the Neutron Radiation location in Batavia.  What a promise, Sue, and how you have honored it!

During many of these surgeries and medical visits as well as the follow-ups, I have remembered Meryl Tullis' advise to look up, way up, before the torrents of tears can take over.  Between Janet's friends and mine and my wonderful church, our families and neighbors, we have never felt abandoned.  Instead we have had great support all along.

Text: Lois Trever-Basten "Seven Wonderful, Terrible Years"
Images: Joe Bflstck images captured from a great blog entry http://www.ronmartin.net/blog/archives/1312
and
http://rexwordpuzzle.blogspot.com/2010/12/joe-btfsplks-creator-fri-12-17-10.html
originally drawn for Andy Capp comic by Reg Smythe who died of cancer in 1998

A Tale of Two Forwards, Part II

John Wayne in True Grit.

Mom had not one but two forwards.  The first I posted last week from Dr. David P. Wilkinson, fearless leader of the St. Francis of the Foothills community in Tucson in the 80s when we attended.  The second forward is from another doctor altogether, Dr. George Sisson.



Not very often does a head and neck cancer surgeon have the opportunity to write the prologue of a book written by a three time cancer survivor.  To be a long time survivor itself takes "true grit."  A person must have deep inner faith not only in his or herself, but also in mankind.  Spiritual inspiration  must be mentioned, for it is available to anyone who will open their heart and mind.

Dr. Sisson served as mom's surgeon in the 1990s at Northwestern in Chicago.  Besides mom, he had another more famous and eccentric celebrity as a patient, Mr. Yul Brynner.  Mom never met Yul, but was introduced by Dr. Sisson to the Yul Brynner Head and Neck Cancer Foundation, co-founded by Yul and Dr. Sisson in 1981.  From Dr. Sisson's forward he states the mission of the organization was to "financially give support to young investigators whose projects on the cure and treatment of head and neck cancers merit pilot funding."

Wow- I never know where these posts are going to take me, and its always some cosmic full circle.

A minor mention of "true grit" I never noticed before. I knew it was a John Wayne movie, but today the eye patch connection has me all aflutter. Add to that a strawberry moment from my own life, a breakfast with my dad and husband at the True Grit Cafe in Ridgeway, Colorado a few years ago. I even have a shirt from there. Funny the web life weaves.

Anyway, back to the Forward:

With these words may I introduce Janet Trever, a highly educated, worldly and wonderfully kind of human being who has, by facing serious challenges head on, highly motivated other cancer patients to "keep their faith" and thereby somehow, someway, undeniable encouraged healing.  Cancer patients who have been through this experience know full and well the truths expounded by Janet.

Janet has not only given of herself to other cancer patients on a one to one basis, but she has actively participated in programs such as the Yul Brynner Head and Neck Cancer Foundation which was established by Yul and myself in 1981 with the charge to financially give support to young investigators whose project on the cure and treatment of head and neck cancers merit pilot funding.  The results of these studies and investigations are of valuable help to the National Institute of Health when it selects cancer programs worthy of even more intensive funding.

Having practiced my specialty for over 50 years and been the witness of the sorrow and elation of many patients and their families, I am delighted and especially honored to make a brief statement.  I cannot overemphasize the healing power of persistent optimism and faith not only by patients, but by their doctors, other care givers, and their families--and also by the inspirational contributions of patients like Janet Trever.

To read more on the history of the Yul Brynner foundation or on Dr. George Sisson, please visit http://www.ohancaw.com/history/ and http://www.headandneck.org/.